Then a long nightmare came to our family, unpredictably, too soon, too bitter.. T_T
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On 27th February my dad felt like gastritis attack and we brought him to the doctor, but when the pills are run out after 1week, he sick again. My husband and I decided to brought him to IGD at RS Harum. He had some blood tests and the test result is not good.
On 22th March, he was diagnosis got chronic kidney disease. Unfortunately I didnt join to meet doctor at that time, so I couldn’t ask about the stage of his kidney disease. It made him very down and his condition weaker day by day until 1st April his breath is not normal again.
On 1st April, we brought him to IGD RS Haji, he hospitalized until 5th April. There were some strange things, like my father’s brain condition is not normal again, he often forget about the place, the time and his memory was mixed together. I know that because I always beside him when he got prostate operation. His condition was really different and I really sad because 1 week before he hospitalized, he seems normal for me. He could answer what I asked to him, but when he hospitalized and days after that his condition getting worse T_T
On 13th April he hospitalized for 2nd times, yap 1 week after he checked out. It broke my heart when my dad should use some tools to help his breath, and some medicine infuse to cure his disease. He lost his conscious with half opened eyes. He was in condition sleep in a few seconds, then woke up and struggle to get free of his hands, so the nurse decided to tie his hands T_T
His body was poisoned by ureum in his blood. His brain was also affected, it called “Delirium”. The existence Ureum/Urea in his body was too high because his kidney was getting worst, from 3rd grade to 5th grade, which means he should do dialysis therapy. But wih his condition it was not possible, need ICU room that capable for dialysis, he should be transfered to other hospital.
After 2 days there wasn’t any good progress to him, like the medicine was not effected, so we initiate to asked nurse and doctor regarding my dad condition. We tried to search others hospitals that capable to handle my dad case because they told us to “help them searching other hospital”.
After some drama..we got the approval from doctor, so we finally have historical medic documents for hospital transfer. It was such a relief moment to us, that night my husband and I could sleep soundly. I also dreamt of him, he was not sick anymore..he smile at me, sat on his wheelschair and answer my question like his normal condition. I prayed to God when Subuh Prayer, “make it easy if my dad could be cure, or make it easy if the time was come”. We believe that Allah will give the best answer to us :’)
Few minutes later, my dad passed away at 05.25 am. When I got a called, I was not sure, because his latest condition seems lost his breath (sleep in a few seconds) and his breath back again when he tried to untie the rope. But after make sure, it was true and already checked by doctor and nurse.
I couldn’t imagine before, I lost my dad, too soon for me, for our family. I wish I would be at this moment when I was 40’s. When my parents already seen my children :’(
Sometimes I wondering, a lot of “what if..”. Cause in short time I couldn’t handle my anger, my temper, and not tried to be more patience. Why I couldnt make him happy and just give his favourite meals and drinks.. Why I didn’t take some photos with him, in his good and bad condition. T_T
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